Wednesday, May 31, 2006

A sushi bar, a guy and some crapy work...

I never would have thought of wearing my long forsaken school uniform...again.. -.-"


Work, as a waiter, odd-jobs-man, and some other stuff you would rather not know or you would never set foot in any restaurant again...


I work part-time at Ten-Ichi, part of Lok Tian, the Hilton of restaurants in Kuching, Sarawak.


Yeah.. Today was hard. Fucking kids. Fucking smart-assed customers. The only customer that I like was a guy from Osaka, a Japanese guy. He watched the chef behind the sushi bar, skilfully makes a round of many varieties of Japanese non-fried food, that is sushi and sashimi. Yeah, the Osaka-jin likes the green devilish stuff that can make even a hard-cored drill sargent cry, given the right amount that is.


'Mouto! Mouto!' [More! More! in Japanese]


Ok, ok... He didn't say that. He speaks English. Understandable e-go, which is very good for a Japanese.


Haiz.. My feet hurts. Will elaborate more the day after tomorrow. Will be off to Bau tomorrow night for Gawai. Some of my co-workers are dayaks.


Monday, May 29, 2006

Random Pics from the Country to the City...

Ah~~~ Yesterday was the clash of time when I traveled from the city to the countryside and back to the city again...


Well, what was I doing in the countryside? My grandma lives there, in the 32nd Mile, roughly 50++ KM from the city, in a little town called Serian.


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Forget sight-seeing, just take a look at the boars. These aren't your bacon and ham kind of swine, but the kind of food that roams around the forest with their tusks facing outward, ready to poke and 'peng' you like satay...

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Well, back to the City to catch a movie, X-Men III with some friends... Crapy ending, stupid clueless kids and the ever disgusting sticky floor... Probably from spilled soft drinks [ i hope...]

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And time for an 'after a crapy movie' snack...


Walked all the way from Star Cineplex to Padungan. Its roughly 1 km or so, to a little shop called Lau Dian, Old Shop in Chinese. Its next to The Office, which is conveniently a bar.. Imagine this scenario...

Its 9 p.m. and GuyA was lazy to go home to the wife and got caught up with some colleagues in a bar...

(Ring~~ Phone call from the wife on the cell)

Wife: Where are you?

GuyA: In the office dear...

Wife: Still working this late ar?

GuyA: Well, I got caught up in some last minute work that I need to do...

Wife: What's that background music?

GuyA: Oh, my colleagues are just unwinding with some music that they like so much..

(The waitress moans..[Dom came up with the whole scenario...] )

Wife: AH!! Whats that sound??!!

GuyA: Oh, that's just my secratary....Oh! Are you worried that I'm unfaithfull to you? Don't worry, she's only sleeping with my boss...

In the end, crissis avoided...


Ah-hem.. Well, soon there will be a bar named 'Work' or maybe 'Church'... Ahahahahaz...


Anyway, I had a honeydew sego what-ever-u-call-it... Dom says the watermelon is better...

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Lesson learnt is that Dom sure can eat fast. The speed of light I tell ya! He down a steak, a bowl of rice, coleslaw under 4 minutes. Wow man! Some other customers just look at him, the Kuching Tsunami.. [well, you know, some Jap dude is the world fastest eater..]

Friday, May 26, 2006

Sorry Man!!!

You know, my mind recently just stop for a while with the frequency of once every 10 minutes. Yeah, it just went blank, for like 5 seconds. So, in a day, productivity lost would be 0.2%. But, if you include the rustyness of the blade in my brain, the actual number would sum up to be 59.2% productivity lost in social skills. Crap! Not going to school for more than half a year sure is a major shock to the system.


So, I'm sorry Dom. My brain is more than halfway underutilized, undone, unbaked...


When I restarted it, I realized that there are a list of possibilities of what I could have done....other than the long regiment of slowly laying a bed of thorns for Dom... [ok, the act of sending that chain mail was not planned... KL agreed to it too!!! ]


1. Ask for the asshole that gave her my name and number and find him to give him a present...


2. Jump straight to step 4 ,without the vulgerness...


3. Ignore the crap. Period.


4. Politely ask her to fuck off!!! [my politely is different from you people when some weirdo comes up to me and talk cock...]


5. If step 4 fails, unpolitely ask her to step away and without the feeling of remorse and giving a shit bout her feeble feelings, trampling on it like it was the dirt under my shoes.


6. Fucking stalker!!! Get a Symbian 60 software [smartphone OS] that blocks specific phone numbers from accessing the service provider.


7. Get a new number. [waving the white flag... -_-" ]


Yeah. I shouldn't have passed such a dangerous chain letter around. But, I really thought that Dom would like it, since he is teaching young students... Guess that the weirdness in a person like her overwhelms even a person like Dom...


Hey man, no hard feelings ok? My history of weird people coming up to me pushed me into a corner, forcing me to pull in a watching bystander of my tango of 'wierdo ocean' as a sacrifice...


Thursday, May 25, 2006

Am I a magnet for weirdos???

Shit! I'm not even at school and I still have all those fucking weirdos at my neck... [I'll talk bout that later...]

My life [a terrible one] as a weirdo magnet started when I'm going 16. Yup, the first step into becoming an adult and I'm 'greeted' by people that are out of the ordinary and sometimes repulsive to some. Yup.. My life is thrown into a sea of weirdness by someone who is weirder than I am...


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[Yup! Just like the one I illustrated myself..]


My school life as a Form 4 and Form 5 are never free from weird people. Lucky me... While some people get to have a high school life filled with love, I get a life that is filled with weird people, never ending...always there... -_-"


Its like there's a sign that says, "Welcome! I'm a weirdo!" hanging on top of my head, even though I'm not one myself..[At least on my account]


Here's a scenario...



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[The one's in bracket are what the weirdo interprets...]



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[Yup! I drew those...]


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[These are almost actual real events...]


Fuck all those weirdos!

Today, I turn on my phone at 3p.m. [lazy and sleepy]

2 SMS and 5 missed calls...


Wow... The first SMS reads, [in chinese] " can we be friends? => "


" I really wish that we can be friends" (the second one...)


I fired back, asking "who the fuck [not actually written] are you?"


I'm S (I only put the initials to help the poor gal to save face..) Can we be friends?


Who are you? have we meet? Do you even know my name?


[Actually written by her] U is Yi Soon [Ciplak! even got my spelling wrong!] Can speak chiease? (not a typo)
Can sAiak chiease? (not a typo)


What is 'can sAiak chiease?'


[In Chinese]You can't read Chinese har?


[ignore] how old are you?


[In Chinese] You donno Chinese ar? How old are you?
Speak Chinese mar?Please...... 14 years old lor...


Does it really matter if I can read chinese or not?


[In Chinese] How old are you?


By now I put my phone on offline mode, like having your phone switch off and not getting any signal, without turning off your phone...

Tulan! Chee bye kid kacau me. Without missing a beat when I'm late to reply by miss-calling me. Tulan....

To sum up what all those 5 smss' I recieved when I went offline, she asked about why I didn't reply her, saying whether if I ain't wanna be friends with her, asking me to send a photo of myself, asking if I have a girl friend...[ Shit! when someone ask you that, means that that person or his/her friend is interested in you]


To further escape this problem including a lolita complex labled on top of my head, I further ignored her crap.


She keeps on writting in Chinese, while I replied in ang mor [meaning Malaysian IM lingo]. She even requested me to write in Chinese! The nerves man!! Ok, friends, I don't SMS in Chinese unless it's used to tell the Chinese names of people.


So, knowing that kids these days have the Garblement to thank to to learn English from more than one subject, that is Math and Science in English, where as I am taught in Bahasa Melayu, I was wondering why she ain't fluent in English. I asked her in Chinese (leveling with her) " Ain't kids these days learn English in more than one subject?"


[In Chinese] Please write in Chinese. I don't really know English. Ok?



Tulan! What nerves! Soon she sent me her photo...
Well, I can say that the tulaness in me would fade [only a little] if she was a babe..But... After just 1 glance of the picture in a love shaped outline, I deleted the MMS. Bluekkkkkk!! [the sfx of puking]


That was the last straw! I turn the phone in offline mode once again.


.

..

...

....

.....

......


Ok, after having my dinner to fill my empty stomach, watching TV to digest the food, I reluctently turn the phone online.


Ciplak, 10 SMS from her and DiGi sent me an sms saying that I have 5 missed calls.

But this was the best I heard from her...

[In Chinese] We can't be friends har?


[I.C] Yeah!!! Your very smart!! I would appreciate it more if you stop bothering me!!!!


[I.C] Who?U mean me?
Ok, I would never disturb you, ever!


[I.C] Thank You!Heck, I don't even know who you are!


[I.C] Ok.


[I.C] Very good!!! Muhahahahaz... [I'm at the boiling point now..]


You is stupid guy![its from her, not a typo] bla,bla,bla...


Liddat du beh song liaw ar? So bo liaw ar lu?! [Kaboom!!! I exploded..] (Just like that and you become unhappy liaw ar? Why you so bored?)Why u so keen to become my friend?


[I.C] Looking for a boyfriend and friends.



Hiroshima calmed down. Feeling regret in letting an atom bom on her, I blabered,
[I.C.] Ok, Becoming friends, I'm down with that. But if you want to find a guy, I can introduce you to one. (number). His name is KL... [muhahahaz.. like sending a chain letter]


[I.C] really?!



So, I warned KL about a 'freind' that is about to visit his handphone...

I suggested pushing her to Billy or somebody, like Dom...


In the end, KL was not up to it to dance in the tango of 'weirdo ocean', so I gave Dom's number to her.


Sweet dreams Dom!!

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Cock speaking down on parrot??!!

If you have a choice of owning one of two feathered friend, which is a rooster and a parrot, which would you choose? [Provided that your not interested in cock fighting]


Would you take into arms an animal that wake you up at 4 in the morning??


So, now you are asking, "You talk what cock now ar??!!"


Well, the garblement is talking cock in today's headlines...


CM Slams 'parrot' Opposition.



First off, I'm not into going against and complaining about the garblement, just making fun of it in various parody and photoshop... Much like the artist Lat, minus the fan-chu-ism...



So, the news reads..


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For the WTF??!! moment, please read the above and below...


If the politicians doesn't listen to the people, who the fuck should they represent? Their own money face??!!


Now, for the parody and joking around...


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[*cheveux gris is french for white hair... and the ang mor is Pek Mor's wife. ]



Why can't those that are representing the people be like a little better looking? [At least not like the one on the left of the Ang Mor..]


Why don't they learn from the oppositions? At least look after their image. Its a fact that better looking politicians always have the people's vote (most of the time). Like Kennedy vs. Nixon. Kennedy won because he puts on make-up on TV...


So, the oppositions employ their own strategies...


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[Wouldn't you vote for them after seeing their first impressions???]


Anyway, there's still some time before the election. So, its the perfect timing for those beauty centre to earn some money from the rich...

Bla bla bla...

NO! I'm not talking crap this time... Its a restaurant in Kuching which includes Koi Ponds next to the stairs so that if you ever felt hungry and find the menu tiring, ask the chef to fry the fish... [But, who would eat a fish that has plenty of bones and basically may cost your all your arms and legs?]



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[So, who ate the fishies first??]


Before we start, I would like to say that some of the images are those to which I 'hijacked' for another site, sixthseal. I wouldn't have if I had my camera with me... But some of the pics I took with my handphone...


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When you enter through the backdoor, [its better because your like entering a tropical island resort with palm trees and so on...] there's a pond with stone pavements. Better not to bring toddlers coz they either get themselves wet or they are afraid to cross the watery gap.



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[Skinny-dipping anyone??]


Since my friend, Joash booked in advance, we got to escape the prying eyes of people walking past the front door of the restaurant. Instead, we got the perfect seat to throw water balloons at cars, in the first floor of the shop, next to the window, watching the urban 'river' [traffic]...



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[The front door... As you can see, better book in advance because its usually packed...]


I would personally say that this a nice place for something sub-fancy-pants kinda occasion, like first dates or something cause the ambiance is kinda nice and its not too quite [escape awkward silent moments ~~] and the lighting is romantic enough, [Asian standards, coz we like to see what we eat.] and it has many visual stimulants, i.e. pictures to start a conversation.



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[conversation piece, like..'what do you see in that piece of art?']



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[The building is very old. Retro yet trendy.]


Ok, ok... I didn't do anything of that sort in there. It was a homecoming/farewell dinner with some friends of 6.



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[Those chairs are actually wrought iron. You'll be having stronger arms if you often eat here..]


Now, the food. First thing first, how come restaurants nowadays like to use big-assed heavy plates when the actual food is only 50% the surface area of the plate??!!


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[Plates are big and heavy.. Good for smashing people's head in case your date is a jerk...hahaz..]


The simple menu that we ordered....[If I can remember..] Note that these names are not the actual name of the dish.

1. Thai-styled Chicken with lemoned jelly-fish


2. Midin (a type of edible fern that is a
delicacy in Sarawak only) fried with red wine


3. Deer meat sauted in black pepper sauce


4. Grilled salmon with cream cheese.



[Since I was busy eating, I didn't take pics of the food. Besides, who in the right mind would stop an army of hungry people from eating??]



Well, the food that truly stands out are the Deer meat and Salmon. The rest are like those that you get in a normal chinese restaurant.



The servings are enough for six. I mean only enough.



How much does it all cost? RM81. Consider the salmon, its quite a reasonable price.



What to do after a dinner like this? Well, consider meeting some of your other friends at Bing!'s

Friday, May 12, 2006

What do Temples, Churches, Mosques and schools have in common??

Well, what do Temples, Churches, Mosques and schools have in common??


1. A sanctuary during troubled times, like war...




2. Stupid people that goes there but donno how to park their car or drive.




I mean, whats the purpose of praying for world peace when they are the one that are causing the traffic jam and making people angry?



Like today, its Wesak Day (The day to celebrate the birth of buddha..) As usual, the people that wish to keep peace with their enemies ended up making more.



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[Stupid cars parked outside the temple]


There is a temple near my house, thats also a kindergaten. So, its like hell outside the temple when you try to pass the stupid cars that are parked outside on the road.



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[The scene of idiotic behaviour..makes me wanna kill them..]


And how bout those churches
. Those morning sermons or prayers sure causes other road users headache during those early morning commute. Why? Churches in Kuching dont have enough parking or Kuching people have golden legs where as their legs are too precious and heavy to walk more than 5 metres from thier cars to the nearest enterence.



You'll know its Christmas when people on the road start to carrol, " Cheebye chia!! Pang chia pun be hiaw pang!!" [ Fucking cars!! Ain't they know how to park?] and the ever memorable, " Mai Ku!! Ki Church e lang liaw liaw si 'kim kar' e ar? Kia lai ki tiaw ho e er charity. [ Fuck!! Are all those that goes to church have golden legs? Better saw off thier legs for charity...]



Anyway, Happy Wesak day to all you Buddhist out there.
Muhahahahaz...

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Hahahaz...

You might probably wonder like what the foot would I be doing (for now) since I'm not gonna go into Form 6... Well, SK-II has the answer... M-A-N-G-A!!!!


Yup! I've recently got a 'shipment' of manga (8 discs to be exact full of updates of mangas that I missed since CNY...)The total of manga in GB is 6.07...(thanks to my sis's "friend" as old ppl would put it...) [Its all from IRC and don't ask me for the links.]


Well, here's some of the manga that I read and like...


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20th Century Boys. Its bout how the world was destroyed and taken control by a mad man and so on...



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Bleach... I liked it before it became popular with all you's people out there and those fan chus that make the nice piece of manga look like its their shit!


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Beck or Mongolian Chop Squad. Yup! Its a manga from Mongolia... [Like shit like that would happen...] Actually its from the motherland of mangas... Its bout how hard it is for a Japanese Rock Band to make it big in Japan.



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Death Note. Become a Shinigami and uphold justice!!!



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EyeShield 21. American football in Japan?? Well, its so god damn funny...


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HunterXHunter. Shit, I omos forgot what happened to them coz the update is so slow..[maybe its juz me..] Due to Togashi Yoshihiro's illness, well I'll forgive his 'art' to slip. There's juz too much explaining on the manga... Like reading a book...



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One Piece. Dreams of becoming a Pirate King??!! Is so freaking funny, exciting and funny. The mangaka is very original in his jokes and art.



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Yakitake! Japan. Don bother me to explain to you the title. Its bout making bread. Its funny and a great way to increase your knowledge on Japanese Puns or as they might call it cold jokes.





Now... I purposely leave the longest picture filled portion to last is Naruto.


Well, I liked it before I went to KL when I was 15 and was in a specialised shop selling Shounen Jump and Original Mangas, Animes and Soundtracks. Juz than, I learnt that not to show that you are psychotic bout Naruto coz some fatso fan chus came by to say, "hey! Naruto!"


Then, they would start to drool.



I've learnt the term 'Narutard' soon after.... [bout 2 years ago, I think..]



To sum it up, I liked it before there was a term for a Narutard.



Well, what is a Narutard? Here's a link I found to that flash.


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Narutard



I've even found the second part to that story...

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Narutard-2



And when I read the update, there was even a Narutarded version. He-he..


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[Reading too much Naruto made you to become a Narutard?]



Well, I'll be busy reading them...


[p/s. Thanks to all you's scanners, tranlsators, distributors and staff that make scanlations of manga possible...]



Glossary:

Mangas: Japanese comics where you read from the back part of the book (if your English o wad) and from right to left.

Mangaka: The person or team that draws mangas.

Shinigami: The God of Death if you directly translate it.

Sunday, May 07, 2006

Study?

I bet 'normal' people all have a few reasons for them to study. I know some of the reasons would be...



1. Parents say, "Its for your own good..."




2. Some loop-hole in your Universe came up with the idea, saying, " Your parents are right!" and you listen to it...



3. You or some other idiot found out that Study=$_$ in your face when you got a job...



4. Well, some genius have no reason to study but they do it anyway. Why? I donno coz I'm not one!



[I'm positive that some of you have thier own reasons to bind with the books so maybe you can leave a comment.]

Well, mine is like the between the second and third reason...Coz yesterday, I became a cowboy with the ability to milk those dumbass organization [Its dumb because it controled by fan chus!!!] for some spending money... ke-ke-ke...

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[yup! its for the money! ]

Yesterday I spent the better part of the day at the kuching civic centre attending some half-assed ceremony where the VIP [very idiotic pigs] came at Kuching Standard Time where everybody is late at least half an hour.



Then, they give some half-assed speach where nobody listens to that last for an hour. I regreated not having breakfast or go for a long walk outside coz the fucking main event only started two hours after the designated time frame.


But, at least there is RM200 in it.

Friday, May 05, 2006

Haa?! Its oledi 6 months liaw ar???

Yes! It has been six months since the final paper on SPM and like most people like me, we all did pretty much nothing except juz to sit down and watch TV and drink beer and maybe try to keep our sanity by going online frequently eventhough its on dail-up and its probably more economical to use broadband. [Try RM108 for internet charges...] Shit! What the fuck did I do for the past six months?

Well, I'm lazy to fill up the void in this issue [online for too long... -.-"] so I'll juz post a funny picture when I went to Serian...

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

[Yeah... The first time that a box company has its own mascot...]